xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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