Acid is not a monday night drug
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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