omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
