He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
