the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I just found puke in my bra..
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
i out mim tonsoeep
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