Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I just googled if crying burns calories
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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