The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
