Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Randomize
