Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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