is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
