I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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