Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands

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(804): View more from Virginia

god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.

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(678): View more from Georgia

Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.

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(813): View more from Florida

watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(780): View more from Alberta, CA

there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.

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(361): View more from Texas

I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.

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(614): View more from Ohio

Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me

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(303): View more from Colorado

If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.

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