Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
