i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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