we were pretty classy up until the second keg
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize