great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
i need some magic done to my vagina
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
