nut hugger
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
They are going to name an STD after you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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