dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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