after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
