dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
