How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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