Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
