Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
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When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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