a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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