yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize