dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I fill condoms, not promises.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
