so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
