Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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