She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
