So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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