he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
