Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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