she looked like the before picture.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Shame - the story of my life.
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