Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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