I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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