How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
