You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize