It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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