Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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