I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
the day after is always just damage control
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
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