i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
