In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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