I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
