i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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