He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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