I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
