what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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