If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
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