Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
