dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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